It's a Jungle in Here

18 May 2007

friday photos

Between feeding my Lost obsession in anticipation of next week's season finale, reading Neil Gaiman's short stories at breakneck speed, and worrying about our upcoming moves, I haven't had much time for blogging. But I do have time to post some cute photos.

James trying to hide from the camera:

Mother's Day mini-golfing:

Evan's first try at mini-golf:

The boys posing on the putt-putt course (notice James' carefully-chosen golf-pro pose):

Evan at the children's museum -- I am really into mirror shots; it seems like I'm always posting them:

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

13 May 2007

happy mother's day!

Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there. May this be the one day out of the year on which your children are so wonderful that you don't desire to lock them in a closet or cover their mouths with duct tape.

My kids have made this a day to remember: James painted a picture frame at school, so now, every day I can look at the smirking face and flyaway hair of my darling firstborn. (It really is cute, but I just wish my kid could refrain from making ridiculous faces for even ONE photo.)Evan, instead of gifts, decided to surprise me by demonstrating some new talents he's learned. These include putting a DVD in the player by himself, emptying my sewing basket of its pins, throwing things in the toilet, throwing a cup of water around the living room (this was done on purpose, presumably to see how many things he could soak with water in one go), and moving a chair into the kitchen to reach the leftover Easter candy on top of the microwave and thus eat all of the jellybeans (this last one before I even managed to get out of bed this morning).

But we're going to play mini-golf, and I'm refusing to cook dinner tonight, so all in all it's not such a bad day.

Thought I'd share some mother's day links -- fun whether you're a mother or not:

The Onion's Mother's Day page
MomsRising -- a cool organization working to make life better for mothers and families, and thus, basically everyone
TV moms! Trivia, a quiz, and a list of the best tv moms.
The Mother's Day Proclamation, a pacifist hymn by Julia Ward Howe, and one of the early calls to celebrate Mother's Day in the US

Happy Mother's Day to you and your moms.

11 May 2007

friday photos

You know, I'm starting to realize what an inconvenient day Friday is for posting photos. Usually we do interesting things worth taking photos of on the weekends, so by the time I post them here they're already a week old. Which is not exactly a big deal. But, for example, tonight we're going over to the Lilac Festival, where we will probably take lots of interesting pictures (and possibly see Mike Doughty, who sings one of James' favorite songs ever: "Busting Up a Starbucks"). I suppose I could always post photos on another day of the week, but then I would lose my catchy alliteration.

Shut up already, Heidi! On to the photos!

I don't remember what James was trying to do in this photo, but I think it's funny anyway:

A hawk has taken up residence in our neighborhood. He or she is very pretty and slightly scary:

Evan, asleep on the floor with his light saber:

The boys eating ice cream on the stoop on a warm evening:

Evan likes to choose and put on his own accessories:

Also, I can't remember whether I've mentioned our whole moving situation on the blog yet, but we found out that we were not given an extension to stay in our current apartment for a few more months. So this means moving sometime this summer and then again in the fall/winter! Yay! This means James will get to attend two kindergartens! Yay! I'd say more about this situation but I'm way too excited right now about all the moving and upheaval in my future. Wait, did I say excited? I meant irritated. Really, really irritated.

04 May 2007

my first meme + friday photos

I have been tagged for my first-ever meme. At least, I think it's the first I've done on this blog. I'm too lazy to go check right now. Anyway, I like it not only because Ryan wrote it, but because it's retrospective. Look how our little Heidi has grown!

10 YEARS AGO I

1. was 15 years old. Good Lord!

2. started dating my first real boyfriend (the kind that involved more than holding hands).

3. wished that my mom wasn't so strict. I was one of the only people I knew with a curfew.

4. joined the track team -- the first sport I did in high school.

5. was still in winter guard. (I haven't thought about that in years. Wow.)

Me at 17 -- the closest I have on the computer of me at 15.

5 YEARS AGO I

1. was a new mama to Sweet Baby James.
2. was taking a semester off of school to stay home with my baby.
3. was feeling pretty lonely being the only undergraduate mother I knew.
4. was really involved in LiveJournal. That's a little embarrassing to admit, now.
5. was alternately blissful and depressed, due to the whole new mama thing.

Me five years ago

2 YEARS AGO I

1. was 8 months pregnant and hugely, ridiculously enormous.
2. had an active 3-year-old who I was preparing for nursery school and for being a big brother.
3. was over a year into my full-time stay-at-home mama career, after graduating in December 2003.
4. was really, really impatient to have my baby.
5. you know, the pregnancy was really the main thing. I was SO BIG and SO IMPATIENT.

Me, hugely pregnant two years ago

1 YEAR AGO I

1. had recently been hired as a community assistant here in my neighborhood.
2. started playing ultimate frisbee again after a year and a half of laziness and inactivity.
3. had recently resurrected my book club, which is still going strong (if not all that frequently).
4. started a myspace page because I'm SO COOL.
5. was really pretty content with how things were happening in my life.

Me with my mom and Evan a year or so ago

YESTERDAY I

1. sorted a crapload of baby clothes for our yard sale tomorrow.
2. went for a dress fitting and felt more confident that I won't look like a lavender whale at my sister's wedding.
3. made guacamole. YUM.
4. took the boys to a picnic in Greg's new building on campus (well, not his building, but the new building where he'll be working soon.)
5. baked a million mini-muffins for James' class.

TODAY I

1. assisted at James' school.
2. am ridiculously tired because I stayed up too late last night doing yard-sale prep.
3. should probably go for a run. But I might not (see #2).
4. had cereal for lunch.
5. need to do some gardening stuff.

TOMORROW I WILL

1. hold our freaking yard sale, and I will be SO GLAD when it is over.
2. go to a Cinco de Mayo party!
3. see my old friend Sean at said party.
4. hopefully sell all of our junk.
5. take everything that doesn't sell to the Salvation Army drop-boxes.

It was actually a little bit difficult to do this! Maybe because I'm so tired. But I actually had to go back through my blog archives to fill out the one-year and two-year portions of this meme. I have a terrible memory.

I don't know what to do about this tagging thing though. Karen is sick, Jessica just reviewed her last ten years in honor of her tenth wedding anniversary, Samay is lazy, and I don't know if Kim does memes. I guess that leaves Melissa and Emily. Tag! And if those of you who I excused above want to participate too, go for it! Even though I gave you rock-solid excuses not to.

01 May 2007

a conversation in lieu of a real post

[Heidi is rambling about possible career paths.]

Heidi: Maybe I should be a park ranger. I know! We could live in Yellowstone and I'll be a park ranger there. That way when the supervolcano blows, we'll be killed instantly instead of having to suffer through the aftermath for years and years.

Greg: Yeah, I can't wait to go flying through the air, being burned by hot cinders and probably suffocated by the gasses, then falling and getting smashed by gravity.

James: I don't like the dying part.

Heidi: James, what do you think Mama should do?

James: Mmmm... you should be a veterinarian.

Heidi: Oh yeah? Why should I be a veterinarian?

James: Well, you've been to the doctor a lot.

29 April 2007

reason #93512 why i love my kid

James comes in from playing outside, whimpering about a scrape on his ankle. "Mom," he says, "will you clean it and put a band-aid on it for me?" I say yes and he says, "But first let's look at it under the microscope to see if there are any germs!"

(Because on Friday I found this microscope at a garage sale and we are having a blast with it. It may very well be the best $4 I've ever spent.)

27 April 2007

baby loves disco

When I saw this article a while ago, I thought, "Hey, what a cool idea: renting out a club on a weekend afternoon to hold a dance party for kids! I wish they did this in Rochester." And that was pretty much all I thought about it until Newsweek ran this article about it recently. Then I found that a blog I read occasionally had linked to the Newsweek article, appalled by the idea*. And almost all of the comments on this blog's post were in agreement.

I found this really weird. Now, you can think whatever you like about clubbing. I like it once in a while -- I love to dance -- but I can see that some people don't like loud music, flashing lights or sticky floors. But I think the articles make it clear that Baby Loves Disco is about translating the clubbing experience into kid-friendly terms -- kids' music at a reasonable volume, kids' snacks, bubbles, balloons... it sounds to me more like a party, just held in a space made for playing music and accomodating lots of dancing people. (There is alcohol available for parents who aren't driving, but please, tell me that you could be in a room with dozens of hyperactive small children for a couple of hours and not want something to drink.)

Some of the people on the blog post I mentioned expressed concern about this sort of thing leading to early drinking or pushing kids to grow up quickly. I think critics of this idea are taking their preconceptions of nightclubs and applying them to toddlers without stopping to think that no reasonable parent is taking their child dancing at a club in order to replicate the adult clubbing experience. I'd take my kids to this type of event in a heartbeat, and I'm sure Greg would be on board, too -- I think it would be a great way for all of us to do something we enjoy, together as a family. Music, dancing, snacks, lots of other kids... it sounds like my boys' idea of heaven. Just because it's held in a place normally used for adult entertainment and recreation doesn't mean it has to have any relation to adult activities in any way other than location. Besides, who doesn't love disco balls? I'm not sure my kids have ever seen one, but I am pretty certain they'd love it.

There were a couple of parents on the blog post, too, who mentioned that the fake tattoos available at some of these parties are just going too far. That just made me laugh, because, seriously? Temporary tattoos are a negative thing? I guess I'm a worse mom than I thought, because my kids have been wearing tattoos practically forever. For them, tattoos are like stickers that don't fall off.

Anyway, I spent a while looking at the group's website this afternoon, and I'm really disappointed that nobody's doing it around here. Maybe I'll look into it for the next time we're in Seattle, because the more I read about it, the more fun I think it would be.
______________________________________
*I'm not going to link to this blog because I don't want to put up for ridicule or criticism a blog that I often enjoy reading, but happen to disagree with on this topic. You can read some people's complaints and criticisms in the two linked articles.

26 April 2007

confessions

Via Ryan, I've discovered and become hooked on True Mom Confessions*. It's equal parts fascinating, depressing, heartwarming and hilarious. Some of the confessions I really relate to, and others I'm glad that I really can't relate to. Some of them are incredibly sad or even frightening, and you wish you knew who these women were so you could get them some help.

But what's most interesting to me is seeing so many different kinds of mothers sharing so many of the same fears and insecurities. It helps to disprove the notion that motherhood and marriage are always fulfilling, or that any one style of parenting is better than any other. You can see that other mothers are making the same mistakes you are, or feeling just as inadequate. You can see that lots of mothers are tired of trying to keep up with everything, and practically every mother gets sick of her kids sometimes.

After all the articles you read telling moms everything we're doing wrong, and all the things we should be doing to turn our kids into geniuses, it's kind of nice to see that I'm not the only one who can't keep up with the expectations.
_______________________________
*And I made a confession! Nothing dark or horrifying, I'm afraid -- just something petty, but it made me feel good to actually express it.

25 April 2007

my kid is the best

On Monday we had this year's parent-teacher conference at James' preschool. It's just incredible to look at his growth over the year, and especially over the last two years. Last year at this time we still had a lot of concerns over his emotional development -- for such a bright, confident, social kid, he has always been remarkably sensitive. But in the last year he has made huge strides in learning to control his emotions (i.e., being able to talk through a problem instead of simply bursting into tears) and this year, our biggest worries are his skill with scissors and his pencil grasp, both of which are proficient but not great. I'd say that's a lot of improvement.

Some highlights from his teacher's assessment:

James is an attentive listener... eagerly participates... works independently and creatively... exhibits excellent comprehension skills... responds creatively to literature, enthusiastic about play-acting the stories we read... generally cooperative and helpful... a pleasure to have in class... a bright boy with a lot to offer.

And on his emotional development:

James shows growth in the social/emotional realm this year. He is making a variety of friends and is well-liked by all. James is making positive efforts towards negotiating and compromising with others. His ability to deal with disappointment is much improved.

I think the bit about making a variety of friends is in there because last year, there were two boys who basically carried out James' every command, followed his directions, and copied just about everything he did, and this year, one of those boys is no longer in the class, and the other spends a lot of time with a friend of his who joined the class, so James has been forced to interact with the other kids. This was actually really hard on him at first: going from leader of your own little gang to just another kid in the classroom wasn't easy for James, but he has adapted splendidly. He makes me proud.

James' teacher writes in the letter (and has pointed out to me many times) that James "knows so much about so many things it is sometimes hard to remember he is still a 5 year old boy." Each of my kids has had that issue: being so advanced in one particular area that it's startling to remember that in other areas, they are typical. With Evan, his early speech fooled us into thinking he'd be quick at everything, and that's definitely not been the case. Likewise, James' aptitude for reading, science and math has made him seem so mature that his emotional immaturity seemed unusual, when actually that aspect of his personality was more age-appropriate.

But James is growing up, maturing in every way. First Evan starts changing from a baby to a toddler, and now James is changing from a preschooler to a kindergartener. Man, these changes bring out a lot of sappy mama talk from me. But I would have to say that this is my favorite part of parenthood -- witnessing this growth and development, guiding them through these changes. This is what I love about being a mama.

20 April 2007

friday photo

Just one photo today -- now that the weather is getting nicer, and things are getting greener, the deer are coming out to munch on our lawn. The photo isn't great quality since I had to take it through the window so as not to scare the deer away, but I think you get the idea:

We've been seeing deer almost every day this week , twice right out in the backyard. So calm and peaceful and pleasant... it's actually starting to feel like spring. Thanks, April, for shaping up!

I went a little crazy at the grocery store because it's spring! And spring means almost summer and summer means delicious fresh produce. We're breaking out the grill this weekend, so I bought red and green peppers, eggplant, and mushrooms. Can't wait until the prices of asparagus and summer squash come down, because there is nothing better than grilled vegetables. NOTHING.

18 April 2007

not a baby anymore

I have said since before Evan was born that he would likely be my last (biological) baby. Natural childbirth really confirmed that in my mind. No more pregnancies and childbirth for Heidi, please and thank you.

So for a while now I've been looking forward to leaving babyhood behind. I can't tell you how glad I will be to come to the end of dirty diapers and sticky fingers and food in the hair and the interminable slowness of a toddler trying to do everything for himself. I am so looking forward to the freedom we will have when we no longer need naps and strollers and the cumbersome toddler car seat. We took a major step last week when we took down the crib. His new haircut makes him look more like a little boy, and less like a baby boy. He is really, finally growing up. At last.

Lately I've been cleaning out a lot of our old things for an upcoming garage sale. Holy crap, do we have a lot of junk. We are clearing out vast expanses of space in the basement by getting rid of the huge stroller, the baby swing, and the baby bathtub, among other things. And the clothes! We have bin upon bin of old clothes in all sizes.

So today I was sorting the clothes. Putting away James' old clothes and getting out summer clothes for Evan, besides figuring out what to get rid of. And I went through the box of 2Ts, and ohmigod are they enormous. And I could not wrap my mind around the idea that my little, tiny baby boy is actually big enough to fit into those gigantic clothes!

It got worse when I made a realization. The realization was this: if I'm not going to have any more babies in the foreseeable future, then there is no reason to hang onto the mountains of tiny baby clothes in my basement. Shocker, right? But there is something about the idea of losing those baby clothes that is just so sad to me. I am giving away my boys' tiny baby clothes and dressing my ~~baby~~ toddler in real little boy clothes.

I have been looking forward to moving ahead for so long that I never really thought about the fact that that means leaving babyhood behind forever. And this is just one of those difficult stages of parenthood, happy and sad and bittersweet all at once, equal parts mourning and relief.

My little boy, my last little boy, is growing up.

16 April 2007

a few minutes of fame in the blogosphere

There's a good handful of people who've been reading my blog for a while. If you're one of those regular readers, you must know all about the ways in which I'm psychologically damaging my sons. You must be aware that I really want daughters. Certainly you'd agree that I'm sort of "loco", possibly "delusional", and probably a little "off". It must be obvious, because some of these guys managed to draw those conclusions from reading only one of my posts!

I'm fairly amused. This is the first time, to my knowledge, that I've been linked anywhere, and it's by someone who thinks I'm crazy because once, I painted my son's nails when he asked me to; because I did not forbid him from trying on a pair of my heels when he expressed curiosity; because I entertained the idea of buying him a skirt when he asked me to.

I'm actually quite pleased at the number of people on that forum who can recognize that I love my sons, and that I'm not willing to limit their self-expression based on some arbitrarily gendered cultural guildelines for appearance. One of them also pointed out that Jesus & Co. had "a certain propensity for long skirts", to which I say, right on! If it was good enough for the savior of mankind, it's good enough for my kids!

As to the allegation that I want or need a daughter: I have been known to say that the main reason I'm sad about not having any daughters is because of the adorable, ridiculously froufrou clothes. I guess it says something incredible about my self-restraint that I do not, in fact, force my sons to wear that sort of clothing. It helps that I have a niece for whom I can buy such things if I really can't resist. Or, you know, what with me being a woman and all, I could wear them myself. But other than clothes, I don't have any reason to desire a hypothetical daughter over the wonderful sons I actually have.

So it wasn't my influence (my example, perhaps, but not my suggestion) that led to James' nails being painted. Believe it or not, my son did ask, entirely un-coerced, to wear nail polish and a skirt. He tried on my heels because they were lying out on the floor, not because I bribed him with a Gameboy. In fact, a couple of months ago, he saw a grandfather and granddaughter at the library and said, "I want my hair to look like that." I thought he meant the grandfather ("What? Why do you want gray hair?") but he actually meant the little girl's long golden braid. So we started growing his hair. And I will admit that James' ponytail was my idea -- it was my suggestion for keeping the hair out of his face all the time, and he liked my bubble-gum hair ties. But the inconvenience of growing his hair long eventually made him decide to cut his hair a few weeks ago. I was glad, though, that his decision was practical rather than gendered.

By the way, James does not own a skirt. I looked briefly last summer for something kilt-ish, but couldn't find anything I liked, and it hasn't really come up since then. Although, this morning when I went in to pick him up from preschool, he was wearing a flowered dress out of the dress-up room. So I guess it's too late for James -- the psychological damage has been done. We'll have to count on Evan to be the manly man -- but wait! Evan likes to play with dolls!! God, what have I done to these children?!

Greg looked around on the forum for a little while last night, trying to figure out who these guys were and how they'd found my site. (Believe it or not, my gender-bending post is the most frequently visited page on my blog. A lot of people reach it by Googling things like "paint his nails" or "under his skirt". I don't understand it, but I hope I can be of service.) He pointed out to me that a lot of the guys on that site are into comics. I'm a fan of certain comics, and movies made from them, but I was not above pointing out the irony of guys who like to read about guys who wear tights finding fault with a little boy's experimentation with his wardrobe and appearance.

12 April 2007

uh-oh

Yesterday afternoon, I put Evan down for a nap and sent James outside to play. Ahhh, I thought, some peace and quiet. Time to relax.

But suddenly, I heard the pitter-patter of little feet running around upstairs. Was it the neighbors' kid? (Sometimes, with the way these apartments were built, something happening next door can sound as if it's happening in your own apartment.) No, this definitely sounded like our apartment. Did we have a ghost? If so, it would be the first time I'd seen evidence of a ghost.

So I went upstairs to check it out and found Evan in my bedroom. "Wait a minute," I said, "I just put you in your crib." Didn't I? Yes, I was pretty sure I had. Had James helped him get out? No, James was outside. That left one explanation:

(Sorry the video is sideways; I don't know how to fix that. And please ignore the fact that he's not wearing pants.)

He's not even two! James slept in that crib for three years and never made it out on his own. (He tried twice: once, he got stuck on top of the railing and got scared; the other time, I freaked out and scared him saying things like, "You're going to fall and break your neck!!!" No, I'm not proud of that lack of composure, but it was effective.)

But Evan, Evan climbs out of that crib like he's been doing it every day of his life. So last night we took the mattress out of his crib, and he's now temporarily sleeping on a tiny mattress on the floor. Only, to say he's sleeping is an exaggeration. Last night he played and ran around until he collapsed. I'm dreading trying to put him down for a nap today. With Evan, I don't think this will be an easy transition.

I almost wish it had been a ghost instead. I suspect that would have been easier to deal with.

11 April 2007

goodbye blue monday

Kurt Vonnegut has died.

Any of you who know me know that I'm a huge Vonnegut fan. His books have been really influential to me, in several ways. He's among my favorite authors ever -- not just because he's written great books, but so many great books. I've dreamed of having a grandfather like Kurt Vonnegut. I thought about naming one of my sons Kurt, in no small part because of Kurt Vonnegut. And now he's dead.

I told Greg, and he said, "Well, everyone dies." I know. I guess if I'd ever thought about it, I'd have realized he'd die someday, obviously. But I guess it's always a shock when living legends die. And now I can no longer hope that he'll write another book. Now I can never hope to meet him. Not that I could ever realistically have hoped for that, but maybe I could have seen him give a speech somewhere. And now I never will.

But I'm glad that I found his books. And I'm grateful to him for his impact on my thinking. I guess it's appropriate to end my little tribute here with a Vonnegut quote, from Isaac Asimov's funeral: "Isaac is in heaven now, that was the funniest thing I could have said to a crowd of Humanists. God Forbid, should I pass on sometime, may all of you say that Kurt is in Heaven too."

If there is a heaven I'd like to believe he's there.

spring things

Not much time for blogging lately, I'm afraid. I'm going out of town this weekend (a vacation! without my boys!) for my sister's bridal shower, so out of kindness to Greg, I'm trying not to leave him with piles of unwashed laundry and dishes, or shelves and drawers completely emptied of toys and books and games.

In addition to the routine cleaning and upkeep, we've also started spring cleaning. Last night we cleaned our computer desk, which was a much lengthier task than you'd probably expect for a desk. Today I'm tackling the basement, hoping to find lots of garage sale material.

I've also been working on my 101 Things list. So far the hardest part has been coming up with 101 measurable and (hopefully) achievable goals. A few nights ago I made it up to 77 in a burst of sudden creativity, but I've stalled since then. I could take the easy way out and list things that I know I'm going to do anyway, such as buying a wedding present for my sister, or going berry picking this summer, or taking the kids to the beach or the zoo or something, but I'm trying to challenge myself a little bit, and it's more difficult than I expected to even think of the possible ways in which to challenge myself. I'm still thinking, though.

Oh, but I've decided not to post the final list here, or maybe just an amended version, because some of the things on my list involve surprises for people who read my blog, and I wouldn't want to ruin the surprise by announcing it. Or, you know, fail to actually do the surprising thing once I've said I'm going to.

Easter was kind of uneventful this year, as far as holidays go. I slept late and the boys did the basket-finding and gift-opening and candy-eating without me. I was kind of upset about that at first, but now I've realized that I've got about 37 other chances in a year to see them wild with gift-opening and candy-eating excitement, so it's not such a big deal. I wanted to post some photos, though, of what happens when you dye eggs with undiluted food coloring. First, the eggs -- the all-green eggs are the food colored eggs; the others are painted:

Lo and behold, when I peeled the first green egg:

They were the most beautiful eggs ever:

And they made crazy-looking egg salad:

The crazy blue-green eggs kind of made up for missing the Easter festivities. That, and the leftover candy. So it's all okay.

06 April 2007

friday photos

Special haircut edition.

05 April 2007

an open letter to the month of april

Dear April,

I wanted to say thanks for the great time we had earlier this week. You took over right where March left off, and you were mild, sunny, and beautiful. The boys and I spent hours and hours playing outside on the playground and in the sandbox. It was so nice to feel like we were finally leaving winter behind. I made fruit smoothies for James' preschool class and we could sense summer in the air, on its way. I thought we were showing suitable appreciation for your kindness.

But then. Something happened. What happened, April? My frisbee league started last night and I should have been running around in shorts and short sleeves, but instead I was squinting against the raging wind, huddling in three layers against the snowflakes beginning to fall. I have to admit, it's nice to be able to run around playing frisbee for an hour without feeling like you're sweating... but that feeling was much nicer in October, when I was expecting it. I wore my winter hat last night!

How does that rhyme about you go, April? "April showers bring May flowers"? Right. Well, then, what do April blizzards bring? Lizards? Gizzards? Obviously, nothing pleasant. I prefer the flowers.

My neighborhood is having an Easter Egg hunt on Saturday, April, and we aren't really keen on the idea of hiding those eggs in snowbanks. My sources tell me you're not yet ready to change your mind and lighten up, but I do hope you'll consider the feelings of all of us who depend on you for relief after the long winter.

Hugs and kisses,
Heidi

02 April 2007

what have i done?!

Apparently I wanted to start the week off in the most depressing way possible. What did I do this morning? I cut my baby's hair. His angelic golden curls, while torture to drag a comb through, were so beautiful. And now they have been chopped off. By me. He used to look like this:

But now he looks like this:

Now he looks like every other little chubby blonde boy out there. On the plus side, people will now know he's a boy. (You'd be amazed how many people think golden curls only exist on girls!) But. Those curls. Gone.

I. CUT. My little boy's curls. I miss them so much! It's going to take me a while to get used to this.

30 March 2007

friday photos

If you were to come to our house, this would greet you on our front stoop.

James, on a recent trip to the cool playground.

Evan, riding Clifford the Big Red Dog.

Evan in a playground tunnel.

Evan, in the infamous spaceship box.

Crocuses in my garden! At least I think they're crocuses. I'm not a botanist.

29 March 2007

baby's first knock-knock joke

Evan told his first ever knock-knock joke today. And his second! (Of course, you need to imagine this all in a sweet little baby voice, without pronouncing Rs or Ls.)

E: Knock knock!
Me: Who's there?
E; Toilet!
Me: Toilet who?
E: Toilet bathroom!

And then:

E: Knock knock!
Me: Who's there?
E: Toilet bathroom!
Me: Toilet bathroom who?
E: Toilet bathroom in your pocket!

And that's where I put an end to it. Probably my least favorite thing about having a second child is that everything is accelerated. He's making up knock-knock jokes before he's two! (And they're about as good as the ones James made up when he learned about knock-knock jokes when he was three or so.) But he's also picking up on the dreaded "bathroom talk" (as they call it at James' school, where it is very popular, perhaps because it is so sternly frowned upon) before he's two. That's not something we need.

But, you know what? I laughed. Because, as the mother of two boys, I can't not think bathroom humor is funny at least some of the time, because otherwise I'd go nuts.

By the way, today is, so far, a much better day than yesterday.

28 March 2007

101 things in 1001 days (part one)

Okay, it's been a whopper of a "My Kids are Driving Me Crazy" day (I made a third child cry today! How evil am I to expect a preschooler to carry his own sweatshirt?!?! Oh, the tragedy!), but I feel like I've been really negative on the blog lately, so I want to switch gears here and write something positive for a change.

From the blog Get Rich Slowly, I found an interesting meme: make a list of 101 things to accomplish in 1001 days (roughly 2.75 years), and try to achieve them. I've been mulling it over in my mind for the last couple of days, trying to decide if I really feel ambitious enough to take on a challenge like this -- it'll be hard enough to even think of 101 goals in the first place, much less actually complete all of them! But then I thought, it's so rare these days that I actually challenge myself (instead of being challenged, in both good and bad ways, by various small children) -- why not give it a try? Worst case scenario: I don't finish everything (though I will surely finish some things. I've got almost three years, after all). Best case scenario: I accomplish 101 things! And I think it would be really exciting if I could do that.

I don't have a whole list worked out yet, but I'll post it in sections as I think of things. They won't all be monumental challenges; some will likely be pretty mundane. Some will be short term, some will be long term, some will be difficult, some will be easy. We'll see what I can do. To begin with, here are my first 10 goals.

1. I will buy suits for the boys for my sister's wedding. (This will be done by the end of May, or I'll be in trouble.)
2. I will toilet train Evan. (Three years should be enough time, no?)
3. I will knit another Christmas stocking, so my boys can each have one. (To be completed before Christmas 2007.)
4. I will bake a cheesecake. (I have never done this, even though I love cheesecake. I've just never had an occasion.)
5. I will clean out the basement (and the rest of the house) and either sell our things at a yard sale, donate things to James' nursery school's garage sale, donate to the Salvation Army, or throw away the worst of it. (Hopefully in the next couple of months.)
6. I will grow tomatoes and eat them. (And hopefully other delicious things, too, once I have the space.)
7. I will move out of our current apartment to go live somewhere else. (Lack of details aside, this will hopefully happen in 2007.)
8. I will register James for kindergarten. (In April, once we find out about extending our lease here.)
9. I will play in a frisbee league this spring and summer (and fall if we still live here then). (I will do this even though it scares me because I am ridiculously out of shape.)
10. I will take my children camping this summer.

Anyone want to try it with me? Anyone have any suggestions for things you think I should try to do?

what does it take to get fired from this job?

The events of this morning have made it clear to me that, if this were a paying job, I'd have either quit or been fired by now, because I am really not that good at this stay-at-home parenting thing.

This morning, I'm babysitting for a friend's son while James is at school. Currently my baby is on the floor screaming for orange juice, because he's not interested in the water I'm offering him. The only reason that the boy I'm sitting for is no longer crying is because I turned on the TV to shut the kids up. I make children cry! I make children cry because I will not give them orange juice when they turn up their noses at the drink I've already gotten them, and because I will not return them to their mothers an hour before the scheduled time. I have never heard so much crying! The kid I'm sitting for has a pair of lungs to rival Evan's, and that's saying something.

Who let me be a stay-at-home parent, anyway? I'm not qualified. My house is constantly a mess; my five-year-old is still not registered for kindergarten (I got the paperwork in December); I cannot for the life of me convince my toddler to eat a single vegetable, even those he once loved; I bribe children with video games and television; and now, this morning, I had two children, one of whom is not even mine, screaming at me for different reasons, while the other mothers on the playground looked on with pitying smiles.

It has been a rough morning.

27 March 2007

randomness

I think I forgot to mention that I survived as a single parent last week while Greg was out of town. I mean, obviously I survived. But it actually went a lot more smoothly than it ever has before. I can't decide if it's because my kids are getting better, or I'm getting better. Probably a little bit of both. I think some of the credit should also be given to the video games I rented just for the occasion. I don't like my kids to play a lot of video or computer games -- I think I'm more permissive about it than other parents we know, but less permissive than Greg -- but sometimes, when you know you have four full days ahead of you of full-time, solo parenting, letting your Star Wars-obsessed kids geek out to a Star Wars Legos video game (which is the second-cutest video game ever made, right behind Viva Pinatas) seems like a necessary thing to do. Besides, the games are going back to the store this afternoon, so I can return to my stinginess about child gaming and not feel so guilty.

In other news, yesterday the friendly UPS man delivered the bridesmaid's dress I'll be wearing in my sister's wedding in May. I was excited to get the package, but then dismayed and disappointed to take it out of the box and try it on, because it's at least two sizes too big. I wasn't expecting it to be perfect, because we ordered the dresses online without being fitted for them, and I am relieved that it doesn't make me look fat, as I had feared it would, but according to the sizing of this dress, someone with my waist size (which nearly fits) should have breasts each the size of her own head (and to say that I don't is probably the biggest understatement I've ever written). Ah, but now I have alterations to look forward to. Although, maybe I should just forget about continuing to lose my baby weight (I know he's almost two. I'm lazy!) and just try to grow into this monstrosity of a dress! Or... not. Not really.

My boys were excited about the dress delivery as well, not because they care about bridesmaid's dresses, but because it came in a box! Can you believe it?!?! A BOX! A box that's big enough for only one of them to sit in at a time and thus has provoked several screaming matches about whose turn it is! To sit! In the BOX! Oh, sorry, did I say box? I meant spaceship.

Okay, I didn't really have much to say today, but I thought that I've been neglecting the blog enough lately, so a short and mostly pointless update will have to do.

26 March 2007

signs of spring

Tulips and crocuses are almost blooming in my garden. On Saturday we had the first thunderstorm of the season. Yesterday I took the boys to a nature center to learn about making maple syrup and maple sugar. Huge flocks of geese are daily flying overhead, returning north in their migration.

This is my favorite time of year. Just when winter has gotten to be too long, too dark, too isolating, things start to thaw and grow. Sunshine, flowers, birds, rain... it's not very green yet, but it will be. Soon.

Of course, there's always the possibility of a surprise April (or even May) snowstorm (or ice storm), but I'm counting on global warming to carry us straight through to summer this year, with no setbacks. I am so ready for spring to be here.

16 March 2007

friday photo

Sorry, faithful readers, only one Friday photo today. It was the only one I took this week, because all of a sudden, for no good reason, I decided to start my spring cleaning, so I've been busy. Blogging may be light for a while -- we're going out of town this weekend, to my mom's. I could blog while I'm there -- my mom has finally joined the 21st century and has gotten not only internet access, but also a computer that was manufactured sometime after 1985 -- but I probably won't. Then as soon as we get back, Greg is leaving on a trip for work, so I'll be single parenting for most of next week.

This week's photo is an art project James made -- a representation of his brother:

Have a good weekend!

13 March 2007

happy birthday to greg

Yesterday was Greg's birthday. He's 28 now, which makes him thismuch closer to being Old. I didn't write anything yesterday, because I spent too much time thinking about what I could possibly write. How can words accurately describe a man who is equal parts genius and ridiculous; who is the best father to my sons I could have ever hoped for; who makes me laugh every day, even when I'm crying; who builds models of solar panels out of Legos; who can outcook me every time without so much as glancing at a recipe; who mended the lining on his childhood baby blanket for James to have; who sings and dances and invents and creates and cooks and tells stories and otherwise makes life so much fun?

Characteristically, I will take the lazy way out -- but it's no less true for not being wordy. All I can think to say is that there's no one else with whom I'd rather be sharing my life and raising my children, no one else with whom I'd rather spend time, no one else whom I trust more in this world. We've been together six and a half years and it's never been boring. I love him, and I'm thankful to have him in my life, and now I will present photographic evidence to demonstrate things I love about Greg:

Happy birthday, Greg. :)

09 March 2007

friday photos

All Evan this week, because I haven't taken any photos of James in a while. Also, I feel a little guilty complaining so much about Evan lately that I thought I should balance it out with a little positive attention, because he is very cute when he's not being a terror.

This photo is fuzzy, but I had to share it because he looks like a vampire and it cracks me up:

The next two photos show what happens when a baby wakes up at the crack of dawn every day -- he falls asleep mid-morning in random places and doesn't wake up again...

...even if you transport him from the car to the house and lay him on the stairs to remove his outdoor clothes:

Now I'm wondering whether I can really keep this up as a regular feature, because these photos are kind of boring. Maybe I should just make my children do more ridiculous things for the sake of cute photos for the blog.

07 March 2007

my children are driving me insane

Okay, I really don't want this to turn into the "My Children Are Driving Me Insane" blog, but it's hard to avoid it on the days when you would sell your children on the black market for enough cash to get a full body massage and a meal cooked by someone else. Someday, I will return to writing Posts With Substance, but today is not that day. Today, my children are driving me insane.

To be fair, I should specify that it is Evan driving me insane. I do get annoyed with James crying that Evan is hitting him or biting him, but Evan is ultimately the source of those problems. And Evan... what can I really say that will fully impress upon my readers the horrors of living with a toddler deep in the throes of the terrible twos, one who is prone to screaming, hitting and biting, one who wakes at ungoldy hours of the morning, piercing the darkness with banshee-like wails?

Most mornings we have the first screaming fit before 8am. What makes him scream? Well, your guess is as good as mine. It changes day to day. For example, today he asked me for a banana. Okay, I said, and got him a banana. Then: "NOOO!!! I want baby banana!" Okay, I said, and found the smallest banana I could find. "This baby banana?" "NOOO!!! I want baby banana!!!" Okay, I said, and asked him to show me which was the baby banana. At this he threw his head back and started crying. "NOOO!!! I want magic baby!"

Whatever that means.

Then there are the times he starts screaming and crying for no reason, at least no reason you can determine. At least three times a day we have the following conversation:

Evan: WAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!
Me: Evan, what's wrong?
Evan: I cryin'.
Me: Why are you crying?
Evan: I sad.
Me: Why are you sad?
Evan: I cryin'.
Me: Why are you crying?
Evan: I sad.

Etcetera, etcetera.

Today I'm far more tired than usual, due to being jolted into consciousness before 7am by lots of shrieking. Evan is clearly overtired as well, and when the two of us are both overtired it does not make for a pleasant day for anyone. James was so easy in this regard -- always so good-natured -- that I'm still figuring out how to deal with a child who is so much more like myself (ie, moody and cranky). So please indulge my self-pitying complaining post -- if you've read this far I congratulate you -- and one day we will return to our regularly scheduled blogging, when I will write about interesting things.

06 March 2007

i'm so spoiled

Yesterday, James went home from nursery school with a friend of his to play for the afternoon, and this afternoon, he is at some kind of preschooler gym class with another friend. Combine that with the long naps Evan has been taking lately (because he's been waking up at 6am) and I've been having a good time the last couple of days.

And -- you're not going to believe this -- I haven't been completely lazy the entire time! When left to my own devices, I occasionally spend my time doing something worthwhile. Observe:

I made pillowcases! (Hey, Mom! I used my sewing machine!) I guess I don't completely fail in domesticity after all. Our couch pillows were getting worn and ratty, so yesterday I bought fabric and made pillowcases for our hideous old pillows. (Because, remember, instead of fixing things, I cover them up. Much less effort that way.)

So, I'm awfully pleased with myself. It only took a couple of hours without the kids shrieking and climbing on me to actually accomplish something. Amazing. Of course, today I'm getting a couple of hours to myself again and so far I've spent most of my free time on LibraryThing, updating my library, and next I'm planning to upload and sort a bunch of photos, but still, those are accomplishments. Not important ones, but I've spent plenty of time in my life doing much less productive things.

It is just so nice to have time to myself. I don't think I can stress that enough. And I will be sad tomorrow when I have to be with both of my kids all day long again. But hey, we only have seven months until kindergarten! I'm starting to look forward to that.

02 March 2007

friday photos

I think I'm going to make Friday photos into a regular feature. I had to do it today because my kids are being so whiny and obnoxious and disagreeable that I needed to remember that they can be very cute and charming when they want to be, and therefore I should refrain from throttling them.

Evan peering through binoculars with lens caps on.

James demonstrating a headstand

Evan in butterfly wings (by the way, he is wearing James' turtleneck over his own dinosaur pajamas. This is what happens on the rare occasions Evan cares what he wears -- he is adamant about looking ridiculous.)

Found James sleeping like this when I went in to check on him last night before I went to bed -- he's snuggled at the foot of his bed with all of his pillows, blankets and sleeping bag. Wouldn't be surprised if there were some stuffed animal hidden away in there as well.

28 February 2007

i get a c-minus in domesticity

I like to call myself a professional mama, and I say that my profession encompasses several other occupations, such as chef, nanny, seamstress (I mended three items while watching a movie a few nights ago so I can now officially add this to my resume), and housekeeper. Now, I think it's pretty common knowledge that I'm a terrible housekeeper, but I've always tried to pretend otherwise. I mean, we've managed to keep most lethal diseases at bay, there are usually clean dishes to eat from and clean clothes to wear, and once you learn to step around and over the toys littering the living room floor, it's almost as if they're not there. Today, though, I came to a realization that, if I were actually being paid for my housekeeping skills, I'd have been fired long ago.

Greg came home today and started coughing when he walked in the door: "I'm... choking... on... scented... candle..." I said, "Oh, yeah, when I came home with James earlier, I noticed that it smelled funny in here, so I lit a candle." By the way, I came home with James around noon, and Greg walked in the door just before six. Greg asked, "What was the smell? The recycling?" I forgot to take the recycling out on Monday, and I'm pretty sure I forgot to take it out last week too, so the bin is now overflowing in the kitchen closet. In fact, half of the kitchen counter is cluttered with recyclables that are too big or heavy to stack on top of the precariously piled bin.

So I said, "Yeah, it could be the recycling, or it could also be the garbage, which is also overflowing, or maybe something spilled on the counter, or..." I trailed off as Greg just looked at me.

The point is, I smelled something funny in my house, and instead of finding the source of the odor and taking care of it, I lit a scented candle. For six hours. On top of that, as soon as I realized how ridiculous I am, instead of dealing with the odor at once, I came to the computer to sit down and write this blog post. I'm not proud of this, exactly, but I do think it's funny, if pathetic, and it's a pretty good example of how I approach pretty much everything in my life.

Now, however, I'm thinking about finding that smell and eradicating it. You know, after I make dinner. And wash the dishes. And put the kids to bed. And watch some tv. And maybe after a good night's sleep.

27 February 2007

some days are better than others

Scene: 6am. I am woken from a sound sleep by sudden shouting.

Evan: Moooommmmmyyyyy! Mommy, I poopy!
Heidi: *rolls over, hopes he goes back to sleep*
Evan: Moooommmmmyyyyy! I poopy! I need diaper!
Heidi: *kicks Greg, who is somehow managing to sleep completely through this, or is a very good faker*
Evan: Moooommmmmyyyyy! I need diaper! I poopy! Moooommmmmyyyyy!
Heidi: grumble grumble mumble please shut up
Evan: Moooommmmmyyyyy! Moooommmmmyyyyy! Moooommmmmyyyyy!

After about 15 minutes of this, I stumble from my bed into the boys' room (Greg, meanwhile, is still sleeping soundly).

Evan, as I enter the room: Mommy! Thanks, Mommy. I wuv you!

Even in a bleary-eyed, sleep-deprived state, I have to admit that's ridiculously cute. I locate diaper-changing materials, take Evan out of his crib to change his diaper.

Guess who's not poopy?

26 February 2007

oscar impressions

Those of you who know me know that I have a weakness for pop culture, celebrity gossip, and movie trivia. Mostly I try to keep these things off the ol' blog, but once in a while I just need to go there. Last night, as we all know, was the Academy Awards, the Most Important Night in Hollywood, so today is one of those days where I need to indulge my pop culture fascination.

Last year, you might remember, I was sorely disappointed in the glamorous but totally boring and drama-free ceremony. This year, I have to say that I was pleasantly surprised. I really liked their theme of focusing on nominees rather than just winners. I guess it was still pretty boring, but I did manage to stay awake for all four hours, so it wasn't too terrible. And as much as I adore Jon Stewart and relish any chance to see him, I thought Ellen Degeneres was a much better Oscar host than Jon Stewart. But then, I happen to be a big Ellen fan. 90% of the reason I allow my kids to watch Finding Nemo as much as I do is because I love Ellen as Dory. Love her. And basically, any Oscar host who is not Billy Crystal or Whoopie Goldberg is okay in my book.

Okay, so I don't have a lot to say about this year's ceremony, so I'm going to finish out this post bullet-style:

Hooray for Pan's Labyrinth! I was disappointed that it didn't win Best Foreign Film, because it was beautiful and I loved it, but I'm glad it got a few awards anyway.
Speaking of foreign films, I loved the Best Foreign Film retrospective to celebrate 50 years of awards in that category. I realized I've seen 12 or the 50 Best Foreign Film winners (thank you, Italian and Eastern European film classes), which is almost as many as the English-language Best Picture winners I've seen.
I was sad that neither of my favorite actresses, Cate Blanchett and Kate Winslet, won an award (though they both looked gorgeous). But I was happy for both Jennifer Hudson and Helen Mirren (who I love as well), so it was okay. Someday, Cate and Kate; someday...
Speaking of looking gorgeous, I'm going to be completely shallow for a moment and admit how glad I was for the return of fashion blunders. Most people looked wonderful, but I got to enjoy a little schadenfreude, mostly at the expense of Kirsten Dunst, who I completely cannot stand for absolutely no good reason. I mean, it's a totally irrational dislike, above and beyond the normal level of dislike she's entitled to for being a lousy actress in mostly crappy movies.
I didn't think that Jack Nicholson could get any creepier, but he found a way! The shaved head along with the sunglasses that seem permanently attached to his face created an alien-like look that gave me chills every time the camera cut to him (which was entirely too often. There was no reason to show him at all, except perhaps to intentionally freak people out). Congrats, Jack!
I love Al Gore. I love that the Oscars went green; I love that his film won Best Documentary; I love that he got to speak about global warming; I love that he can make fun of himself a little bit.
Finally, I hope that Jack Black and Will Ferrell sing an Oscar night duet together every year from now until the end of time, because they are hilarious.

Anyone want to talk Oscars, or movies in general, in comments?

23 February 2007

friday photos

It's finally Friday. It's been a long week -- two days of preschooler sickness is tiiiiring. But James is mostly well again -- well enough, anyway, for me to drag the kids to the grocery store for the groceries we've so desperately needed the last few days. I'm realizing now that I don't think I've left the house since Monday night. That's sad enough that our trip to the grocery store is looking pretty exciting to me. But tomorrow is the weekend, when I can unload some of the childcare duties on Greg, hooray!

Thought I'd celebrate with some photos from sledding last weekend.

James was fearless, barrelling down hills with or without a sled.

Yes, Evan is in the snow and he is smiling. Miraculous.
(It's because we gave him a snowball.)

Evan was perfectly content after Greg made him a "lollipop" out of snow.
(But you should have seen the tantrum when he dropped it, and Mama was unable to make him another!)

21 February 2007

tv time warp

I don't love kids' TV, nor do I hate it. I do seem to have a remarkably high tolerance for it, compared to most other people I know who are not actually children. This being a sick day, we have spent a lot of hours in front of the boob tube today, even sitting through Barney, which makes most reasonable people want to claw their eyes out. Maybe the reason I don't mind most kids' TV is because I'm pretty good at just tuning it out.

But right now? We are watching Reading Rainbow, and I am seriously digging it.

Why? Levar Burton is teaching kids about telling stories though music, and started the episode off with some examples of "the newest style of telling stories" -- music videos.

That's right, they're showing a 20-year-old episode of Reading Rainbow on our PBS station, and I am loving it. They showed video clips from Lionel Richie and Tears for Fears! Run DMC wrote a rap just for Reading Rainbow! And now Pete Seeger is reading (and singing) his book Abiyoyo, a story (and song) we all love.

And I have to say that Levar Burton in a pink shirt with bright blue jacket and tie and tallish '80s hair is truly a sight to behold.

I seriously would not enjoy this half as much were I actually a kid watching it. But I'm a total sucker for '80s nostalgia.

sick day

Poor James is sick today. Probably just a virus -- fever and lethargy are the only syptoms so far. Lethargy is key, though; it's how I can tell my normally rambunctious preschooler is actually feeling badly. I can tell this illness isn't particularly bad, though, because even though he's sprawled motionless on the couch watching a movie, he still manages to laugh from time to time. On his worst sick days he more closely resembles a zombie, so I'm not too worried today.

I used to love days when James was (mildly) sick, because those were the only days, as a toddler, that he would slow down and sit still, that he would ask me to snuggle with him, that he would act as if he actually needed me for something. But now that his little brother is the Neediest and Most Demanding Toddler in the Universe, I get my fill of snuggling and feeling needed on a daily basis, so it's not as much fun anymore. Now I'm more worried about Evan's demands keeping me from comforting James.

Anyway, I think we've got a pretty lazy day ahead of us, so I can't really complain. As long as he doesn't puke on me.

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